Many of the couples we see are confused about what they really want. Marriage counseling helps them gain the understanding they need to make the changes they desire. For those in the early stages of a relationship, counseling helps to build a solid foundation, based on respectful communication. The sooner in a relationship this is done, the better. For couples who have a history of avoidance, poor communication, or lack of trust, marriage counseling helps them to get unstuck. Just as a broken leg gives you pain, a warning sign, a message to you that something is wrong; you and your spouse's behavior may act as a red flag or warning sign that the relationship needs help. Take a look at the following list of warning signs. Do any apply to you and your spouse? Can you add any of your own?

• Spending less and less time together.
• Feeling depressed or uptight when going home, or not looking forward to going home.
• Having less fun when you are together, and time together has become more "serious".
• Spending more money on "frivolous" unnecessary things, or not saving for the future.
• When fighting, attacking each other rather than really listening to each other.
• Feeling put down or taken for granted, or doing that to your spouse.
• Increasing silence between you and your spouse.
• One partner saying more sex will lead to greater closeness, the other saying greater closeness will lead to more sex.
• Finding yourself making many judgements or mindreading your partner.
• Losing your identity as an individual: confused about where you end and your spouse begins; often talking about "we", not "I".

It is unreasonable to expect that couples will heal themselves by themselves. One does not put an untrained person at the controls of a plane and expect them to fly it safely. As professional Marriage and Family Therapists, we are trained to educate, counsel, and assist couples in transition, and in redefinition. We look forward to working together with you and your spouse on identifying and achieving your goals... whatever they might be.